Let’s ‘FAIL’ in Love

How there is not a reality show called, ‘EPIC FAIL- Romantic Gestures’ is beyond me. It would be a show based off reenactments and youtube videos of guys who think they are doing something really romantic, but something goes awry or the girl is just not into it. I am not talking about proposals at sporting events going askew, for that is just a bad decision from the start. You have bad friends, they should have stopped you. I want grand gestures of epic proportion, with heart, soul, and eventual fail. I want to see someone holding a boom box outside the window of the wrong house blaring “It wasn’t me” by Shaggy. I want to see high school boys do really creative things to ask a girl to prom and then have her blow them off (cruel, Yes, but it is high school, they will get over it). I want interviews with the actual people; I want to know there thought process. I want to laugh till I cry and cry till I laugh. I want to see the awkward face on the girl, when she realizes she is in a no win situation. I want to see a guy win a huge stuffed bear for a girl and then have it fall and crush her.

I have always wondered what the actual success rate of romantic gestures is. No way is it higher than 50%. Even the simple task of having flowers delivered to someone at their work is tricky, addresses get mixed up, and the lady in the cubical next to your girlfriend gets the anonymous flowers you sent just because. Romantic tip, randomly send the flowers on a Monday, sets the tone for the rest of her week. Even with a low success rate people (self included) are still confident when planning and going through with their gestures. The idea is that this ‘Pinky and The Brain’ scheme is going to work, the world is ours. No way is the road runner faster than my ACME Jet pack. Although, sometimes the mouse gets the cheese and who doesn’t love cheese.

This may all seem cruel, mean, and insensitive to want to make a show out of other people’s failures in love, but it has happened to all of us, so it is no worse than seeing someone trip on the street and then laugh at them (don’t act like you haven’t been on both sides of the tripping fence). It is acceptable as long as the tripped gets back up; otherwise you are a horrible person.